57 lbs and the truth

Ok, there it is.. the number. The number of pounds I have left to rid myself of. I am gonna be honest here, I've spent too much time in the last few months being inconsistent so my weight is fluctuating all over the place. I have still kept off the initial weight I lost with 21 day fix (that is NEVER coming back.) But I have not been able to pull off the rest of the pounds.

I feel like I have been a complete failure at everything I am trying to do. I feel like I am letting my family down, my challengers down and myself down. I am not reaching my vision goals I set out for myself and I am not helping anybody else to reach their own goals. This is so disappointing. I feel like I have been putting in the work but nothing is happening!! Ok, hard look at myself... I'm doing the work, but I'm not being smart about it and I'm not being consistent. I've gotten much better, but I'm just not all the way there yet.

So here it is... laying it out there for the world to see... ok, to anyone who might possibly read this. I have 57 lbs to lose and My goal is July 1st to have at least 30 of it done!!! I am going to spend many days of the summer in a  swim suit and not hiding in jeans sitting behind a pillow (has anyone ever noticed i ALWAYS do that?) AND I want to change the lives of 13 people between now and June 30th!! I am asking you, whoever you are that is reading this.. if you know someone who struggles with fitness, who struggles with nutrition, or confidence or negativity please send them my way. I am not saying I can fix anything, I am not saying I am any kind of expert but I am going to show others that it's ok to start over for the thousandth time, it's ok to make mistakes and we can do anything TOGETHER!! I am not going to let anyone go through these struggles alone!

I want to build a team of inspiring individuals who also want to change lives. This is not about me making a quick buck, this is not about me earning anything. This is about me changing the world around me and helping others to hopefully end their struggles early.

That is the reality. I need to focus and I need to grow. I need to figure out who I am, how I can offer value to the lives of others, how I am going to turn the blinders on for myself so I can worry about my goals and not about anyone who is beating me at their own. There is a lot of work to be done and I'll get there. Every day is a new beginning, I just want to be done with having a day 1. I will do this!!